Drinking The Darkness

Drinking The Darkness
By Andrew Moravick

He drank in the darkness. The spirits he imbibed filled him well. Those same spirits soon after began to consume him. He welcomed their effect. They moved him to join with others drinking in that same darkness. Their location was different, but the darkness was the same. With others around there were more spirits to be welcomed, and more darkness to be enjoyed. The more control the spirits held over him, the more liberated he felt.

His mind was asleep, tranquilized by the foreign solution he had allowed inside him. His soul was uninhibited. Every desire it had was forced out in his actions. The same was felt by the others in that same darkness. The door would occasionally open as others joined. Though a glow from the outside hall seeped in, no one could feel the light.

He moved only under the influence of the spirits. They drew him toward an alluring silhouette, noticeable in the dark only because of its greater darkness. Such a seductive shape could only belong to a female, and such an alluring female should only belong to him. He stumbled his way to her, feeling the first few ill effects of the darkness. He offered her some of the spirit he had, which she delightfully accepted, taking a little more than he intended to give. Their desires mingled, unrestricted by their minds. His hand was lifted to bring her into him so that his lips could have access to her ear. A few of his spirits left his body in his words and inserted themselves into her. She took his hand and in their darkness they walked through the dimly lit hall to her room.

“Wha- what was-shur name again?” he asked as she closed the door behind them.

“Britney, yuh, you’re Bry, Brian right?”

“Yeah. You- you still wanna do this?”

“Yuh- yeah,” she said as she freed herself from her shirt. Brian removed his shirt as well. She moved closer, locking her arms round his back. Brian kissed her. She unbuttoned his pants. He slid off her skirt. Their actions were fueled by the spirits within them. They stood naked, clothed in the darkness. They awkwardly embraced each other, stumbling through the unlit room, finally falling onto her bed. The world around them had disappeared. The dark walls which afforded them their privacy were invisible. The room was boundless. Brian could not even see the woman that lay beneath him. Her breaths and moans were drowned out by his. If not for the pleasure he felt resulting from his movements he would not have known she was there.

Exhaustion began to infect his body. The many dark nights he had enjoyed before were collecting their payment for his pleasure. The spirits which had afforded him such frivolities claimed Brian’s fitness as their compensation. His energy left him. The spirits’ hold became weaker, having less to feed upon within him. A stream of light slithered into the room through the window as a car passed by the building on the street below. Brian was finished. He rolled out of bed, feeling for his clothes on the floor.

“Whuh- where are you guh-going?” Britney asked.

“I have to go. I have class in the morning,” Brian replied.

He left her room. His eyes squeezed to a squint adjusting to the light in the hall. He made his way back to the dark room he had been in before. He thirsted for the return of the spirits within him. The others in the room gladly welcomed him back to their darkness, sharing their own spirits with him.

Brian was free once more. In the dark he couldn’t look down and see his growing belly. The athletic abs he had been so proud of in the past had left him. In the dark, their absence was not missed. He couldn’t see his widening legs which had grown not out of training, but because of the greater weight they had to bear. The legs that had bought his way into college stealing bases had become slow, but their former speed was not longed for in the dark. All of his worries, all of his imperfections, all the misery of life could not be seen in his darkness.

The people around him stood silent, but the spirits within them filled the room with their voices. Incoherent stories inspired strange fits of laughter. The sounds were familiar to Brian. He did not know whether those noises were from friends or people he had never met before. He didn’t care. They were the sounds of darkness, the voices of spirits which he knew on a most intimate level. They were not firm and commanding like the people he encountered during the day. These pleasant voices demanded nothing of him. They expected nothing of him.
The door opened. The same seductive silhouette Brian had seen before strode into the room. He didn’t care if she saw him. He had his fun. The door closed, but her dark outline stayed in his view. She staggered her way over to another silhouette; this one more robust, but equally dark. Brian watched as Brittney sipped some of the stranger’s spirits. Her hand fell flirtatiously on the stranger’s arm. Brian’s hand tightened into a fist. The spirits within him ignited rage in his veins. His diminished muscles inflated with adrenaline, surpassing even their previous potential. Brian stood up. The spirits which had hindered his coordination abandoned their inebriating effect to fuel Brian’s fury. Brian made his way toward the stranger. Each step fell as if the very floor was the offender he was walking toward. Brian’s hand wrenched down on the stranger’s shoulder.

“Woah! Oh hey Brian. You scared me, Man,” the stranger responded.

“Brian, I th- th- thought yuh- you-ad class in the morning. Whuh- why’d you”- Britney interrupted until Brian broke in.

“I do, but whuh what’re you doing talking to this guy?” Brian’s hand was tightening on the strangers shoulder.

“Dude, it’s me. It’s Jayson… From the team.”

“I unno you, and if I did, d’ya think I’d let you talk to her like that!” Brian’s other hand, clenched still in a fist, rose, rocketing into the stranger’s face.

“Why’d you do that Brian? Luh- leave him alone! I was only”-

“Shut up, whore! Ya plan on takin’ him back ta your room too?” Brian’s words fell as hard on Britney as his blows did on the dark figure lying on the floor.
Hands came out of the darkness around him, pulling Brian away. He struggled to return to his belligerent work, unsatisfied with the damage he had already done. In the dark, Brian could not see the bloody end result of the abuse he inflicted. The hands dragged him away as he watched others tend to the stranger. His eyes slammed closed, assailed by the light as he was thrown into the hall. Brian staggered his way out of the building. His eyes relaxed as he escaped the light. The night air was crisp, but unpalatable to Brian. He only took joy in his return to darkness.

The spirits were once again leaving him, burnt up in the fires of his anger. They urged him to hurry back to his room where he had more to take in. His frantic movement caused him to fall, scraping his skin across the paved path to his dorm. He didn’t feel the full extent of the pain. The spirits took care of that. The only real discomfort he felt was from the light that met him as he entered his building. He stumbled his way to his room. Inside he closed the door, sealing out the abhorred light. He felt his way to his fridge, finding a few remaining spirits waiting for him.
Exhausted by all the action, and the toll the spirits had taken on him, Brian collapsed onto his bed. Sleep replaced the dominant role over his consciousness held by the spirits. The gashes made on his journey bled into the sheets, staining them as he slept. Darkness was hanging over him.

The next morning light invaded the room The intruding rays burned Brian’s eyes beneath their lids. His head was spinning from the unwelcome awakening. He inspected the blinds. They were down as best they could be. He rolled himself off the sheets he had passed out on the night before, not noticing the blood stains he had left. Once off, he folded back his comforter. Then he slid himself back onto his bed. He pulled the sheets over his head blocking out any more of the invasive light. He took comfort in the darkness. Though he had been acquainted with light many times, darkness was a much dearer friend. His eyes closed, returning him to his ignorantly blissful sleep.

Hours later, an alarm clock attacked his slumber as the light had done before. He had set it to wake him in time for class. One lone outstretched hand snaked its way out from underneath the covers to shut off the bothersome sound. He had no need for class. At the moment, he was content to stay in darkness, but for the rest of his life, the darkness would never again allow him to be so content. He had no recollection of the night before. Such was the reward of his darkness. Had he known what he had done the night before, he might have been able to fix things before they got out of his control. Such was the curse of his darkness. Brian closed his eyes and returned to the tranquil darkness of sleep. He didn’t notice the ominous light flashing angrily from the answering machine on his desk.