Poems

THe following are all poems by Andrew Moravick (Me)
Immortality

If think me dead perchance I die,
Than me you kill with watery eye.
Though this vessel descend to decay,
That which I am forever will stay
Alive with you and those with whom my life I’ve shared,
Eternally intertwined our fates forge on powerfully paired.
When my living words were welcomed to your ear,
Why when words still echo my absence you fear?
For here I am on page at present and in future found,
Whether my body still lives or lies still in the ground.
Though Time toils to test the strength of our will
To exist and persist though with us the earth he fill.
My body like all others will change and deform,
But why when gone must my body be mourned?
Death has no claim on page to me our my essence,
And so with words I make perpetual my presence.
I am immortal as long as others can read
The story of my soul and how it was freed.

Aspiration

Hauntingly hanging over my heavy head,
Aspiration an apparition I devoutly dread.
It chills and fills my soul with despair,
Biting and burning with its burdensome stare.
Painfully possessed through life I progress,
Current comforts canceled and satisfaction suppressed.
Eternal infernal spirit, what do you desire,
That require you pester and plague me in furious fire?
Why may I not find comfort in accomplishment common,
Forever fearing failure as yet I’ve not fallen?
To what lofty heights however high must I strive
To quench aspiration so that joy in me may thrive?

Sleep

My eyes are heavy and my body is slow,
Her control of me will never go,
My eyes close n’ asleep I fall,
Obediently answering her alluring call,
Now I am hers- the devoted slave,
Serving her after death n’ the grave,
Every day I try to break free,
Yet every night hers I’ll be,
Strong as I am I can’t fight back,
The more strength I use the more strength I lack,
So I submit to her sweet soft kiss,
Silencing senses and bestowing me bliss,
My eyes are shut and hers I become,
All pain is gone and my body is numb,
Silently I slumber- serving her desire,
I am her product and she my buyer,
Then I awake, thinking I’m free,
To go through the day and see what’ll be,
Then slowly she comes to reclaim her slave,
And then once again it’s her kiss I will crave,
Day after day I try to resist,
Till the last day that I am finally kissed,
Then I am hers- forever a slave,
Silently serving, asleep in my grave.

Sonnets

Should not for sublime climbs I strive?
Would wanting my words to have weight weigh on me woe?
Need I no more knowledge to know?
Does diligence and distinction of joy deprive?
Why then may mediocrity molest my mind?
Why find I agony in acts average and mundane?
Why suffer I such pain at present undefined,
Which wrenches my soul and becomes my being’s bane?
What can one do when all his essence thirsts
For fame found in works wondrous n profound,
Which forth from the prison of anonymity bursts,
So that forever echoing my name may resound?
Why worry I when still fresh is life’s lasting breath,
What will speak for me when I’m silenced by death?


Love Sonnet in Advance

When alone, uninspired, unable to create,
Her hands on my back descend to soothe,
Ridding the blockage all authors hate,
And my mind is inspired as is my pen to move.
When complacent and in satisfaction I cease,
She, knowing me ever critical will be,
And urge me to re-analyze my piece
So that all I put forth is the best of me.
When in lust my mind is held captive,
She comes to me, knowing my need,
And to me all her love she will give,
So in our passion my mind is freed.
And yet though not yet her name do I know,
In advance I write so love forever may show.

God, why when faith I almost acquire,
Fate intervenes causing me to question
Again, and with further self reflection,
Once more gone is the faith I desire?
Why when so wanting I am to believe,
When so willing and obedient I try
To think not that to me my senses lie
So that me your being does not deceive?
God, am I not what you craved in creation,
For you want not love blindly obedient,
Love learned at length not most expedient,
Wanting to obey by will instead of dictation?
So why supply me with such an unquenchable mind,
That deny me the means with which you I may find?

The Mind & Body

I will start my exploration of the world and existence we share with the most familiar components of life, our minds and our bodies. Through the sciences of anatomy, biology, and chemistry, we have come to understand a great deal about how our bodies physically function. We understand that is our nerves that allow us to touch, taste, smell, hear, and see all by relaying messages to the brain. We understand that hormones within our bodies create natural urges to produce offspring. We understand that it is respiration, and the chemical reactions from digestion that fuels or bodies, and allows us to function physically. However, this is all just a level of complacency with the physical understanding of ourselves. Yes, we understand that the brain manages all of our senses and bodily functions, but what do we understand about our mind? Are our thoughts just electrical signals created by our brains, and there is no separation between the mind and the body? Or from what I understand, through the exploration of my thoughts, is there a separation between the body and the mind which can not be measured by science? Furthermore, is there more to discover about the human body alone?
I believe even the body has an infinite amount of aspects to be understood about it. To explore this I will begin at a basic understanding of all human bodies, the heart. If the heart stops beating, blood stops pumping and so without blood flow we die. We know we die if the heart stops, why do we die because of blood flow? We die because the blood carries oxygen and fuel to the body’s cells, and without it the cells cease to function and we die. Then why do we die if cells stop functioning? We die because the cells conduct all the functions of the body, from making up the muscle tissue of the heart which pumps nutrients to other cells, to carrying nutrients to other cells in the blood that is pumped. So it would seem that cells are the basis for all function of the body? This appears so, but what causes the cells to function? If the cells are not fueled then they die, but what does the fuel do for the cells? The nutrient fuel provides energy to the mitochondria, which powers all function for the cell. Well then how do the mitochondria generate power for the cell? The mitochondria do so by creating chemical reactions that produce energy. I will stop the exploration here, because this starts to approach concepts about the body we don’t understand. However, the way in which we were able to understand this much about the body is by continuing to explore what causes each level of our body’s system to do what it does. There is however much more to be understood about the human body. If we did understand everything about the human body, we could in theory satisfy all of the bodies needs, and compensate for all of the body’s natural short comings and thus make ourselves capable of immortality. Not immortality in a manner in which we can not be killed, but in a way in which our bodies do not deteriorate and bodily function can be maintained indefinitely. This would be knowing how the body works, because every component would be understood. This is one of the benefits of continually seeking an understanding of any topic. When something is completely known its perfect state can be realized. For the body the perfect state is immortality.
The mind however is much less understood. It is believed that the brain is the center of all consciousness, and that if the brain is altered our consciousness can be altered as well. This however I do not agree with completely. For one, if the mind is damaged in, for example, the speech center of the brain, words can still appear in a persons head, they can still think in complete sentences and know what should come out of their mouth when attempting to speak, but because that part of the brain is damaged it just will appear as if they can not communicate. However if given a keyboard, or any other manner to no verbally communicate, the individual will still be able to share complete thoughts. The reason for this is that what I understand the brain to be, is merely an intermediary between the mind and body. The brain translates our thoughts into messages which the body can understand and carry out, but the brain does not generate these thoughts. When a person has a degenerative mental disease, their body is decaying, the brain is physically breaking down, however there isn’t really a way to measure the capacity for thought, because the brain is the one thing that translates intangible thought into a physical electrical impulse. The brain works between the mind and the body much like an antenna, if some one is trying to send a message by relaying it through the antenna the message will go through as long as the antenna is there to conduct the signal. However if the antenna is gone, the message still exists, it is still expressed, however it is not sent. The brain if damaged does not result in the destruction of conscious thought, merely a disruption of the signal being transmitted. Even with chemical imbalances such as depression, where a person’s very emotions seem to be stemming from mental problems, the mind or consciousness still exists as it normally does, but the brain, frustrated by the inability to completely work to translate the mind to thoughts agitates the individual. When the imbalance is corrected the person is not content because of the substance or procedure used, but because the brain is working at full capacity once again. The mind’s fundamental purpose is to gain as much understanding through experience, observation, and shared information, which can ultimately better us as a whole being. Some aspects in life are painful to gain understanding of; such as the death of a loved one brings the understanding that we will never physically see them again. However even these negative things can be beneficial because they give us an understanding of what may cause our lives to end, or how to face the end of life. All things in life contribute to our understanding, however sometimes individuals will avoid the negative lessons, and focus only on things that are pleasurable. It is true that pleasurable experiences are just as beneficial; they raise our spirits and give us an increased thirst for life. However it becomes negative when we repeat actions we find pleasurable even though we have gained that level of understanding already. Those who party in excess for example, to understand what happens at a party, and how people interact to have fun is a beneficial lesson, and a good thing to understand, however to abandon the search for understanding because we believe we have found what makes us happy is negative, it limits our minds, and the repetition of excess that comes with parties harms our bodies as well. The mind seeks to understand all things, but by only focusing on lessons already learned the mind becomes useless. So what is the ultimate purpose of the mind? The body’s purpose was immortality, so that the mind could attain an understanding of everything in this world without being limited to just a single lifetime. Then what is the purpose of the mind gaining all this understanding? The purpose, I believe, is so that we may die. This is because if the body keeps us alive long enough to actually understand all that there is to be understood, there still remains one last lesson. That lesson of course is what happens when we die. By finally learning this, the mind becomes understanding of everything and attains true knowledge in this world. So then what good does knowing everything, when we die? This makes life complete and an individual completely perfect, the body has served its ultimate purpose, and the mind has attained all possible understanding thus serving its ultimate purpose in this world.
If immortality is the ultimate purpose of the body, and knowing all that is possible to be known in life is the mind’s purpose than what of love? Our bodies give us yearnings for physical love, and our minds seek out companionship on an intellectual and emotional level, than is this not a purpose in life as well? Yes, love is another purpose, the understanding of love is just one of the countless lessons we seek to learn in life. You see by saying the ultimate purpose of the body is to be able to maintain life indefinitely is not actually limiting the purpose at all. Likewise saying the ultimate purpose of the mind is to gain all possible understanding. If the body can exist indefinitely and healthily it allows us to do other things like helping others, working to improve the state of the world, and to make our own individual mark on existence, however we are meant to do so, and by the mind gaining all possible understanding, it allows us to do all the things we desire to do, or are meant to do in the best possible manner. Love, or the quest for love, is a tool for spurring us on. The body craves the sensation of a lover’s touch, while the mind craves the intellectual connection which allows us to share our deepest and most personal thoughts and ideas. Sexual attraction and desire is not a bad, or evil message, it is the body conversing with the mind its need for satisfaction. Likewise the lonely feelings that may drain our energy, or lower our spirits, stem from the mind desiring the body to find a companion to share existence with. One of the reasons why I understand sex to feel bad or inappropriate at times is because one party, either the mind, or the body, is not satisfied. There is a heavy sensation of guilt when sex happens only for immediate physical pleasure, and not to also satisfy the need for a mental connection. This sort of sensation is much more common than the inverse, when there is a mental connection, but the body is not satisfied. However this does occur when two people completely abstain from physical intimacy in a relationship. The body then sends messages to the mind resulting in a feeling of frustration. Our instincts, as I understand them, are good things, they lead us toward the things we truly need, however the messages they give us can be cryptic, and we often get the messages confused or omit components of that message. When the body seems to crave sex it is not for sex in general, but for the love that satisfies both body and mind. By finding love in someone who can satisfy both aspects of an individual, those needs are met, the mind becomes free to explore further, and gain more understanding of the world. Having a person to be in love with, I understand to be necessary to continually satisfy the mind and body.
If the body is merely a vessel for the mind though, is it necessary to maintain physical fitness? After all, if the mind is not truly connected to the body, than why divert focus away from the acquisition of understanding to maintain the body, since indefinite life is impossible, and the mind is the one thing that has potential to exist forever? It is true that the mind does have potential to continue forever, and at the moment physical immortality is not attainable, but we still are not certain if the mind does continue after death or not. Then logically it is acceptable to assume that the mind may also cease to exist upon death. Then all the time we have to gain all the understanding we can is limited to the duration of life our bodies provide us with. Therefore it is for our best as individuals to maintain good health to prolong life for as much time as we can. Furthermore, being in good physical condition allows us to understand more than if we were in an unhealthy state. A person who has allowed their body to expand due to inactivity is not able to walk as far as a fit person. And by walking and being active we can explore, we can see nature in all her splendor, we can experience the rush of athletic competition, we can better learn the physical limitations or gifts that are a part of who we are. It is however harmful, I believe, to develop the body at the expense of the mind. Every individual functions best when the body and mind work efficiently together in balance, depleting one to improve the other is detrimental to us as a whole.

Second Principle of Understanding

Think, my friends, think often, think deeply, think passionately, think rationally, think thoughts that are correct, and think thoughts that are wrong. Thinking, in a way, is the mind’s method of walking. If one walks a great distance the walk becomes an exploration. The same applies for thought, the more we think the farther we can go. My friends when you think do not fear that your thoughts lead you down the wrong paths, many of the greatest discoveries made by explorers have come from going the wrong way. It doesn’t matter whether a thought is wrong or right, the right thoughts may be more useful at first, but even the wrong thoughts can be beneficial as well. Wrong thoughts, if met with a hungry mind, encourage more thought, such as why the initial thought was wrong, what made it wrong, and what about it can be changed to make it right? Just believing that something is wrong does not do us any good when we don’t understand why it is wrong. If you were to stare at an optical illusion on a piece of paper, and your eyes are deceived to believe that that object is three dimensional, when you understand it to not be possible, you would believe that your eyes are wrong. Does this mean your eyes are inadequate or compromised? Should you seek help or correction because your eyes were so easily fooled? Of course not, but without understanding how the lines of the illusion come together to fool the eye, then you will understand how your eyes are wrong, and you can see the real picture as well as the illusion.
Also my friends, do not fear the thoughts of others, these thoughts are just as useful to you as your own, even if the thought seems negative. If someone looks down on you for a thought you’ve shared it is beneficial to explore why that thought triggered a negative reaction. If the reproach is undeserved, than it is helpful for you to understand what made the other person react so negatively, to show that individual how your thought is justified, and to help the other person expand their mind if it was a close minded generalization that caused them to respond so negatively. On the other hand if another is justified for criticizing your thought, then it is helpful for you to understand what makes your idea so open for that criticism, and what can be done to improve upon that thought or be changed to make it correct. If a fool for example, tells you that, “you are wrong for saying 1+1=2,” then it is to the fool’s benefit for you to explain why 1+1 is 2. However if a mathematician tells you, “you are incorrect for saying X + X always equals 2X.” Then it is beneficial for you to understand why X+X is not always 2X. By being open and receptive to all ideas, and willing to accept the criticism of your own, you allow your mind to expand, and be prepared to embrace many more levels of understanding which you would have never considered before.
My friends, I must also advise you, never allow yourself to stop thinking about yourself. When we think about ourselves we often see what we want to see and stop looking at that point. By doing this we limit ourselves to our understanding of ourselves, and of everything else that can be possibly understood. When you think about yourself, do not just dwell on that which we want to see, whether it is a positive or a negative outlook. If think yourself to be wise, you have made yourself ignorant, or if you believe yourself to be ignorant you have made yourself wise. Yet by believing you completely understand yourself, you make yourself a fool. Life my friends, I understand to be infinitely complex, but by just dismissing it as complex and leaving it there if foolish and cowardly. We ourselves our complex as well, and to merely define ourselves as such is equally foolish and cowardly. Though we may never understand all there is to be understood, by thinking about all that we can, and exploring all the aspects of this world around us and within ourselves, we venture into the unknown, unafraid of what we might find, and receptive of all that we discover. My friends, nothing can be defined in this world, not ourselves, not our deeds, not even our very existence because a definition is absolute; some thing is absolutely what it is. When we understand enough about this world, ourselves, or our existence however, we can think on the potential for these things to be more. We can think that there is more than just energy and matter to the world; we can think that we have more abilities or purposes in this world, and we can think of all the spender and wondrous mysteries that are a part of existence. It is by thinking that we can understand things, and it is by understanding that we can think more.

The First Principle of Understanding

My friends, to convey my message to you I must first show you that nothing in existence is certain. Instead what we believe to be the truth, or certain, is only that which we understand the most. One certainty proposed by the French philosopher Rene Descartes was, “I think, therefore I am.” This seems to be absolutely certain, because if we can think, our thoughts, no matter what existence they may be in, whether they are even correct or not exist because they are ours. However this statement is not as concrete as it would appear, to think means one has to have thought, so thought can be substituted for think, “I thought, therefore I am.” However to have thought does not verify present existence, one may have thought in the past, but can that person still be thinking now, but of course if you have thought, then that means you did exist, so the phrase becomes, “I thought therefore I was.” This statement holds just as much truth as Descartes, and means almost exactly the same thing. However it is possible to think now what was thought before. I understand this may seem complex, but I will explain this further to you. From what I understand of the mind all things which we see, feel and experience are catalogued in the memory, and that is how we believe things have happened. Furthermore that which we can create in our mind are combinations of words, meanings experiences, and other such things that we form with our own personal touches. If my understanding of this mental process is enough to be considered a truthful statement then everything in life becomes memory. Then it becomes possible to think that one could relive their own life if the consciousness does not die with the body. Then, in such a circumstance, the thoughts which are believed to be thought at that very moment are actually just thoughts remembered as one relives their life through memory. This may or may not be the case after death, but the point of this example is to illustrate that even our thoughts are not even certain. We may have thought them in the past, but at this very moment it is not absolute whether they exist or existed earlier. Therefore, “I think, therefore I am,” is not absolutely certain.
The one other aspect of life Descartes and many others will argue to be absolutely certain is mathematics. However, math does carry within it flaws, and imperfections where certainty is not absolute. One plus one arguably always equals two, and 1 is always 1, 2 is always 2, 4 is always 4, and 5 is always 5. However there are times where one isn’t always one and five is not always five. I will of course demonstrate this to you. Take 4.999 repeating to infinity. It approaches five, but never actually gets there, though the difference may be smaller and smaller each time. Therefore 4.999 repeating to infinity is absolutely not five. However, when 4.999 is multiplied by ten, then subtracted from ten times itself, (49.999-4.9999) the infinite nines are eliminated and it becomes forty nine minus four. This yields forty five, and because it was ten times four point nine subtracting one times four point nine, the answer is nine times four point nine repeating, however when divided by nine, this progression yields 5. This equation, which breaks no laws of mathematics, says that four point nine repeating actually equals five. This then, is not absolutely certain, five is not absolutely five if four point nine repeating is five as well. Though this may be only one mathematical phenomenon that illustrates a lack of certainty, it does prove, that even math is not absolutely certain.
The way in which I have disproved both “I think, therefore I am,” and mathematics to be absolutely certain was through my understanding of the human mind, and the subject of math. I am in no way an expert in either field, but it is beneficial to me to have an understanding of them both. I do not hold Descartes or any other philosopher in contempt for attempting to find something that is absolute in existence. It is in fact something that we all seek something that makes living seem worthwhile, and the things which we do in life seem fruitful. The only absolute I am willing to present to you however, is that nothing is absolute. This might seem discouraging, but if you consider it, it is actually quite liberating. If we look at ourselves and define our lives by that which we do, then we attempt to say that we are absolutely craftsmen, or absolutely teachers, or absolutely doctors. Instead it is much more gratifying to say, “I am more than just a craftsman, I am more than just a teacher, I am more than just a doctor, I am all that I understand myself to be, and even more which I may discover.” There is always more to everything in existence, and by never accepting something for what it seems to be, and attempting to understand all that it can be, we may never lose wonder within the world, and can move closer to attaining true knowledge. This is my first principle of understanding, that there is always more to be understood.

Preface

Let me begin by thanking you the reader for taking the time to read and consider all the concepts and ideas that are presented in this book. Without a wonder about the world and what lies beneath all that is experienced within it, my words are useless. I will share with you, in intimate terms, my ideas and understandings of the world and its workings. I will also ask you to not take any of the things I convey to you as absolute fact. My primary understanding in this world is that nothing can be completely understood, and nothing is completely concrete in its definition. To seek knowledge I believe, is gaining as much understanding about as many things as possible. Understanding after all works like pixels within an image, by only seeing a few points the picture is incomplete, but the more pixels we have before us, the clearer the image becomes. So I will ask you to continue to wonder about the things I tell you, to take topics even farther in your thoughts than I can express them. It is human nature to seek more than that which we have, and when we seek things that can not be shared we do injustice to one another. Understanding however can never be had in surplus, there is always more understanding that one can have, and in sharing that understanding we improve each other and do others justice. So this book is not something I wanted to do, but something I must do, to share my views with you, and encourage you, my reader, to consider and wonder about all the things around you. It would be an injustice for me to remain silent and deprive you of the message I have to share. Throughout the ages philosophers have sought one single unifying truth that may better all man-kind for understanding. I however challenge them in that goal. By narrowing all things down to one truth, one definition, one purpose, we limit ourselves and make ourselves imperfect. Perfection as I understand it to be is to be without limit. We are imperfect because our lives are limited, our bodies are limited, our societies are limited, but the one thing in us that is not limited, that is perfect, is our minds, or our consciousness. If we so choose we may continually inundate our minds with the understandings of experiences, information, and the imaginings of our own minds and those of others. In that sense, we as people have the capacity to be perfect, but it is our own logic that limits our limitless minds. We think that it is not necessary to understand all that we can within our lifetime, but to merely believe we know enough to get by. So I ask you my friend, please seek perfection of the mind, take my words and continue wondering as I do. I believe I share in the wisdom of the old philosopher, in that I am wise because I know nothing. I ask you as well to admit you know nothing because all that we think we know we merely understand, and what I understand is that with all there is in this world to know, I only understand a miniscule part of it, and understanding is merely a part of knowing, and so I know nothing. So I ask you to continue to wonder as I do, so that someday, we who know nothing may through understanding approach the knowledge of everything.